Thank you again for your kind advices.
I dun measure gains or losses, whether in monetary terms or not, on my marriage. Ever since I got married, I gave all for my newly-formed family and stopped all the "messing outside". I wanted to give her a new life. It was sweet for the first few years but gradually the relationship deteriorated to the current state.
Only thing holding back is my son. I cannot imagine a day when I go home and not see his happy face, hear his noise and feel his hugs. I know this has a negative impact on him. Whenever we argued, he will hit his fist on the wall. I have also received calls from school that he was fighting in school. I tried to counsel him, but he said he cannot control his anger and become aggressive easily. Now he is called a bully in school.
With all the sufferings, I can only seek short moments of joy "messing outside" to escape this reality.
But the pain is getting unbearable......
