[guyorgirl]

From this point onwards no blue-balls liao. So rest assure, hahahaha... safe to read.

very wordy... VERY...


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gog: I send you back?

J(anice): No...let's go your place.

Janice peeked outside the car as we moved from church to my place. Heavy hearted, I walked infront of her as she dwindled behind me and opened the door and went in.

Janice closed the door behind her as she walked in. She looked like tears were going to burst any minute. I remember her expression, mouth was gaping for deep breaths while she stood there before uttering 2 shocking words to me.







J: I'm pregnant.

My eyes opened big, it was joy, I was speechless because I was worried how can I care for Janice if she remained married to Eric, not because I don't want responsibility. 4 fucking years, 0 results, and finally she got pregnant?






J: Doctor says I'm about 7-8 weeks along. Eric only touched me once since he came back about 4 weeks or so, must be the time I came back from holiday...

I saw tears flowed down from her eyes. What she meant is... the baby's mine?! I wish she said it openly.

Guess life is really screwing you somehow. She tried for years, with IVF even and going for check ups which showed Eric had low sperm count and pregnancy was going to be tough. Nothing happened for the years with Eric. I came along, we fucked raw, for nearly 4 years, shooting into her and nothing happened.

Why did it happen now? I can't answer it. I don't even know why she is crying. A lot of scenarios went across my mind. Is she contemplating a divorce to be with me? Or she doesn't want to keep the miracle baby?

Life is cruellest when you least expected it.







J: We can't continue like this, I can't hurt Eric. This whole [thing]... is wrong.

She said it. She's come to terms that our adultery is bad and she is now feeling the pain of committing this sin with me. The realisation came with the pregnancy. It's like a 'wake up' call for Janice to stop before it's too late. Adultery? No. A wake up call that she got pregnant with another man's sperm was the guilt.






gog: You going to tell Eric it's mine? I'm willing to -

Janice cut me off.






J: No, gog, I'm sorry, this is wrong. It doesn't work this way, I don't want to hurt Eric, I also don't want to hurt you!!!

She already hurt me.

The floodgate was opened. She cried uncontrollably, sadness is not good for any pregnant lady. I know what is going to happen already. Don't you folks?

Holding Janice, she dropped into my chest and cried, letting go what she has been holding back.

For a guy with quippy replies and comebacks, I could only hold her and let her cry. She's guilt ridden and now pregnant and she won't abort it as it's murder.








It was a horrible moment.

We had a long talk, coming to terms that what we started is wrong and I tried to convince her I would take care of her if she wants to leave Eric and I will bring the child up and marry her. I wasn't keen in trying to persuade her to continue having the affair with me while Eric raises my child. I was worried for her wellbeing and the child's.

She confessed she knows what we did were wrong and the pregnancy is a wake up call to sever this evil thing between us. The child will be a gift to remind her what she did and never to do it again. She loves the fetus and Eric is excited too knowing that she finally got pregnant. He still has no idea about me and her...

Farfetched as this story goes, I don't know how to explain the rationale the child is the reason we broke up because she had a calling to 'wake up'. She wanted to go back to Eric and also to find an atonement for the wrong she did (with me) and also to love Eric wholeheartedly.

With this whole relationship wrong to begin with. Who am I to argue with Janice that we should be together? I've always known in my heart one day we will go our separate ways. But this was too cruel, getting her pregnant and leaving me, taking our child together with her. Sometimes life is really unpredictable. 4 long years. It had to end this way with our child inside her.

I can't explain how for 4 years nothing happened but eventually my sperm made her eggs fertilized. We sat there at my place - quiet. Each of us taking time to come to terms that we have to stop here. I'm not sure how long it took, 15 mins, 30mins, 1 hour, 2 hours, before Janice finally spoke again.